I’m relatively new to the publishing world, only having officially been published since 2021. Over the last week or so I was invited to two author events, one was a reading plus a panel and the other was just to mingle. Both events were brilliant. After the events when I was home, I started reflecting on the conversation and the many accolades of my counterparts and I had this sinking feeling in my pit telling me “you are an imposter, you shouldn’t have even been there.”
At first, I began to sink deeper into self-pity at my own lack of ability and I really started doubting myself. I imagine my head and heart had begun to argue a bit like in the movie ‘Inside Out.’ Then a small voice cut through the chaos of emotional turmoil I was starting to feel. the logical and sensible voice saying
“Someone wins or worth doesn’t make you worth less.”
Those words struck me and I realized I had allowed comparison demon to make me feel less. Comparison can be good when it fuels you to better yourself, but it also has the ability to drown you in despair if you allow it. Rather than focusing on my lack I needed to flip the internal script and celebrate the wins of my companions. This got me reflecting on imposter syndrome and what we can do to face it.
Step 1: Acceptance
Imposter syndrome is not a rational thought, it’s a feeling and so it isn’t always easy to tackle something irrational with a logical argument. In order to get to a place where logic can once more be applied we need to start by accepting the feelings. In acceptance, we are now open to deciphering what we are feeling.
I’ve found writing about it quite cathartic, it allows you to really consider what you are feeling and articulate it even if no one else reads it.
The second half of acceptance revolves around acknowledging that perhaps we aren’t as far along in our journey as our peers but we aren’t at the stat either. The work we put in isn’t nullified by the achievements of others.
Step 2: Find the Root
Knowing what you are feeling isn’t enough you now need to dig into the root cause behind the feeling. What is making you feel insecure?
It might be similar to the story I shared above of comparison. I was allowing the accolades of my counterparts to take away from my own self-worth. And I need to remind myself of the fact that someone wins or worth doesn’t make you worth less
Most often I’ve found that it comes from an identity issue, where we attach our value to our work rather than our intrinsic worth. In this case, we need to shift our value system and root our identity in something that is unshakable.
For me personally, that comes in the form of faith and the belief that “[W]e are God's masterpiece. He has created us anew in Christ Jesus, so we can do the good things he planned for us long ago.” Ephesians 2:10.
You will need to find your own anchor.
Step 3: Remembering Why
Imposter Syndrome can prevent you from growing as it hinders your decision-making abilities. You might choose not to take an opportunity because of your fear of being found out as the imposter.
I have found in these moments it is essential to go back a look at the why behind what I do. To relook at the vision I have written down. When we reaffirm the vision and its importance to ourselves we are better able to face our fear and take that leap of faith forward.
Step 4:You Are Not Alone
It’s comforting to know that you are not alone in your feelings. Even the many greats face it. In Maya Angelo’s words;
“I believe what I have to say is important, and I believe the people coming to hear me are important, and so the occasion of itself alone has an importance, which forces me to stare down my nerves.”
I hope you are encouraged knowing that no matter how far someone might be in their career we all feel like imposters at some point. Learning to push past it is part of the journey. Our journeys begin with courage which builds the foundation for confidence.
I would love to hear what your experiences with imposter syndrome and if you have any tips of your own. Let me know with a comment.
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Ashwin Chacko
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Great post. It’s so true that highlighting what work you’d like to gain can really help focus your direction and - in the case of posting about it - lead to actual work. Top tips as per usual 👏👏👏